My first pregnancy-10/97

The first time I became pregnant, it was all over much too soon. I had entered into a whirlwind romance with a man I had fallen--hard--for. We lived together (that is, I stayed at his apartment) for only a few weeks, but long enough for me to fall pregnant. He'd only broken up with his girlfriend six weeks before, and I'd left a boyfriend to be with him, but I thought, this is forever. I was pretty naive.
I didn't realize he and his girlfriend broke up on a regular basis.
The morning after my 20th birthday, I woke up to someone banging on the door. He'd left at 5:30 am, as usual, for work. He'd also taken his laundry to do after work. But to my surprise, his boss was at the door, demanding to see him.
She thought I was hiding him, covering for him, as I tried to explain he'd left for work two hours before. She yelled at me until she was sure I didn't know where he was, then left.
I went back to bed, taking two sleeping pills because I didn't know what to do. I had no idea where he was.
Hours later, his ex's mother called looking for her. So then, it became clear. They'd taken off together. I'd had no idea.
He called a few days later, told me he wanted to give her another chance, but it wasn't working out. He'd be home in a few days--apparently they'd driven across the country.
That night, I took a pregnancy test. It was positive. The next time he called I told him. I don't think he believed me--his ex was always doing things like that so he figured I was doing it too.
Within a few days, I started spotting and cramping. My mother took me to the ER, they gave me the first pelvic exam I'd ever had (I'd been sexually active for only a year, I hadn't thought I needed to go yet) and determined I was pregnant, but it was too early to tell if it was viable or if I was miscarrying.
You may be wondering about birth control--I used condoms. Except this guy couldn't quite complete the act with a condom (his ex was on the pill, so they never used condoms) so we pulled out...most of the time...and I thought I ovulated right BEFORE I got my period instead of AFTER...so apparently my sex education was lacking.
I was told only to take Tylenol for the pain since it might be only a "threatened" miscarriage but the pain and spotting didn't stop. I had just started a job in a convenience store and had to take time off to rest.
During this, he called every so often. I was in tears each time, telling him what was happening. He called from California, from Vegas, promising to get home as soon as he could, but that she was driving...
Finally, one night, the blood stayed red and the pain grew worse and worse. I called teh doctor, and they said that I should go to the emergency room if I started hemorrhaging but otherwise, there was nothing they could do. They'd see me in a week to make sure I'd passed all of it.
I talked to him that night, crying about the pain...
When it was over, when I had finally stopped bleeding a week later, been to my checkup, he came home. He promised to be with me. He left again, a few days later, while I was at work. He slipped a note into my coat pocket to tell me. I read it while I was working the night shift. I left work. I locked the doors to the store but not the storeroom, which was broken into later that night. Needless to say, I lost that job.
I found out a year later that the girlfriend had stopped taking her pill before taking off with him. They were gone for two weeks. She got pregnant during that time.
He moved out of their apt. when she was 6 months along, but stayed with her otherwise. They had a baby girl.
He picked the middle name, the main character from a book I'd given him.